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I Expected Too Much

That was all of the convo I can remember…
“you expect too much of me la”
“don’t take it personally”
“what can I say if you want to be a slut”

And I agree with you man, I really did expect too much. I thought I had this friendship/relationship thing all figured out. I thought it would be reciprocated. But it wasn’t and I was upset. Foolish, thats apparently not how it works. You just invest and if they don’t treasure it, haha too bad…I really thought you wouldn’t throw everything away.  And I never thought you would use the word slut so loosely, just like u did in the past…..

but its cool, we cool….this is just how its gonna be…I got the msg bro

unimpressed 

 

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“don’t so overly attached la”

We went to Frontier at NUS and we couldn’t find a table big enough to fit the whole OG. So we split and the boys sat separately, but someone was frantically trying to sit us all together and Sakinah commented, “don’t so overly attached la” and I lmao-ed.

I met this new group of people for 4D3N and they’re a pretty great bunch. I wouldn’t say I’m obsessed over them and feel the need to see them every day for the next week but we really do match well when the time calls for it. Everyone was so easy going and such good sports, even collectively disliking the same person at one period. During games, majority of the OG was competitive which didn’t make me seem like such a xiaoonz when I wanted to WIN WIN WIN hahahah!!!! There were sassy people, funny people, shy people, siaosiao people, people you could always talk to, caring people, paika people, people you could click with which made LSCAMP really fun.

On the last day of camp I was a little overwhelmed by the fact that I’d be leaving these people and they were going to carry on the journey with one another in NUS and I wasn’t going to be with them. I’ll never get the chance to know them better, see them around school, annoy them etcetc. Are these people the only nice people I’m ever going to meet? Maybe the people I meet overseas will be just as fun and I’ll feel the same way. But I’ll never know until I go…yknow?? I don’t really know what point I’m trying to bring across haha but I’m just sad I’m leaving.

Planning timetables looks fun…. can’t help but keep thinking about them for the time being (or maybe also because the group chat is still alive hahahah)

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OG’s signature flower pose

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Finger to Face

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Shernisee left )-:

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(sorry I made y’all run and run hahahahah)

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S A D

I’m back from camp and questioning why I chose to take this harder route.
This isn’t instigated by wanting to spend my time at NUS with the new friends I made, but just everything in general. Now I have to pack and leave, plan my life abroad, phone plans, being away, studying something real hard, not being in singapore, etcetc.

I hope it passes
I hope I’ll still be friends with these new friends.

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g0lden friendships

Her friendships from Secondary school have lasted her till today, 3 years later. Even though those are all the memories she had, it was sufficient. Being a thousand miles away hath done no damage on these golden friendships.

Will my JC friends last, even in 3 years?

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Sex Ed.

If it feels right, promise I don’t mind
and it feels right, promise I’ll stay here all night.

I never knew…

but now I do and I m intrigued, Singapore. Sweet, innocent Singapore.

tb. remember when our sex ed homework was to break down the sexual connotations in today’s media and I delved deep, PEEL style, into how Flo Rida’s Whistle was about a blow job because he wanted her to blow his whistle hahhahahahshsh 19/20 bby

 

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Always Look On The Bad Side Of Things

“I can’t believe she just said the word ‘fail’.”
What a strawberry generation we are. Cant take a little bit of criticism, expect to be sheltered and showered with praises our entire lives.

But every little mistake met with words of disappointment and negativity will take its toll on innocent hearts. It will make them dread, make them fear until there is no room left for inspired tries and risks . Every idea/thought/ action that begins to formulate out of line will be arrested, the mind will suppress, and this fear will attenuate a young heart’s once burgeoning unsuspecting joy.

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When You Feel It In Your Bones

Yknow that feeling when a song comes on and these EMOTIONS just rush through you and give you all these FEELS. I’ve been having a lot of that recently bc for the past 2 years I’ve been spamming songs for super long periods and my brain has associated songs with different periods of time and different feelings…this post is probably more for my memory than your interest, but if you continue reading then (-: thanks pal

  1. Aint It Fun (Paramore) and Something I Need (OneRepublic) – Nats 2014 and how we used to walk from the bus stop to Bedok Reservoir which was so far in (ok no rly far but far enough to listen to those songs)
  2. Blank Space (Taylor Swift) – West Timor OCIP bc Cel had this song on her phone and played it OVER AND OVER AND OVER
  3. Any Ariana Grande song – training: I attribute this to Kevin Tran and Margey singing Araina Grande whenever we had box pull or after water
  4. Any Calvin Harris song – Chalet/training: again, Kevin Tran always played Summer and Blame etcetc
  5. The Fact (Beast) – O levels because this was on repeat and is now my most played song on iTunes at 356 plays
  6. GDFR (Flo Rida) – Boat maintenance: and Weiqian played this and I was so into and Kevin came out of the shed and heard it and expressed his hatred for this song
  7. Stay High (To Love) – that one time we were doing mileage and during the 18km I sang to myself  in  between pants to keep myself sane 

    12/7/16 (this post was drafted 3 months ago UNTIL)

  8. I Follow Rivers (Lykke Li The Magician Remix) – was played as BGM of one of the videos I was watching and it was instant KEVIN TRAN NOSTALGIA and how he kept playing this at training/ chalet and did his weird but strangely addictive hip/hover hand dance move.

stay tuned for more (or not)